that is what I guess so, throwing the light into blackhole.Well, i actually placed my flash at the angle pointing to the ceiling, i did not wanted the flash to be pointed at the model as i am afraid it will be too overpowered..well actually i am still new in photography and also the flash light aspect..
anyway, to soften the light effectively, you need to increase the size of light source close to the size of your subject, that is why we have many sizes of softbox available.
but to attach a large bounce card or large softbox, but that will be very silly and inconsiderate when you shooting such events with many photographers standing beside you.
in such situation, you can't expect too much, since you have no control of all the elements to make a good photo, eg, lighting, angle, composition, models, posing, background etc,
it can't classify as portrait, so don't be so serious about it.