A question to the admin.


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student

Senior Member
Every now and then, a dispute will surface, and one party resorts to writing in the forum to get the other party to respond.

And almost invariably the admin and mods will say, please settle what appears to be private disputes in private. The admin will say "You have each others telephone numbers. You can call or write SMS etc".

This sounds perfectly logical and reasonable. But there is a slight hitch to this approach.

Very often, the "aggrieved" party had already tried many times, and sometimes the other party had promised to settle the issues. But then, because of some "unforseen circumstances", unable to fulfill what was promised. At other times, the other party remained uncontactable.

How many times do the "aggrieved" party need to try before resorting to a public request?

BTW, these type of disputes, although "private", are related to photography activities, often facilitated by membership in CS.
 

I was referring to the thread by Astin and similar threads which the Mod closed. And I think Astin's thread had been deleted.

Anyway, since you brought it up....

No, I did not contact you at all. Do I need to contact you at all? Are you a child? People here like to say they are adults.

You had written in the forum (unfortunately deleted by the admin) that you will return my things on 18 December 2006. On 18 December, you sent me a SMS using the number 94609958. That statement, which is still in my hp read "Today cant meet U pass ur things later this week bobman".

The end of that week is 24 December.

Today is 2 January 2007. Since you are fully aware (I am assuming of course you are an adult who is not demented) that you had promised to return my things by 24 December, is there a need for me to contact you?

If not why should I contact you?

BTW, my preferred method of contact is through a pager. Not my handphone. And I am contactable at all times through the answering service through my pager. As far as my work is concerned, with exceptions, my handphone is mostly used to call out. Not for people to call in.

Oh, just to remind you. The things are

#1 6 4x5 fidelity holders

#2 Two Elin lights

#3 Large black backdrop.

I will send my office adress immediately after this. Just leave them with my staff.
 

wow. this seems like a private matter to me. one party supposedly to return some items to another party. but did not for whatever reasons. ......
 

Guys..... chill out.

It is the New Year...and let's start the year wif a new mindset.

It could have been a misunderstanding...so .. Peace, ok?
 

seems like communication problems to me. why not do it this way, right now, in public, both of you fix a date, place and time which both of you can make it. we can be witnesses that both parties argee to this particular arrangement and hopfully, it can be resolved without further degration in anger.
 

yes, i will. but, if one desires to be left alone. take it offline, i.e. in private. we certainly have no desire to know.

What its seems to you I am in the wrong??? I put my things in your house because I often go to your house and I need those things. Now when I dont go to your house to use it anymore, can you send it to me???

BTW, since its our problem, can you leave us alone..... Thank you!
 

well, you are right. I had dealing with you once. and only once. in this instance, i do not take sides. take it offline if you do not want third party/parties to ...... .

Dun tok ****!!!! You think I first time know you har!!! Wanna be hero go elsewhere.
 

fight..continue to fight :bsmilie:
 

I find this thread extremely funny.... even funnier than what we have at sammyboy!!!

HAHAHA!!! Keep it up guys!! Please keep us posted on the conclusion!!

Happy New Year!!
 

yes, once only in person. other occasions, only through PMs. experience taught me something.

Wrong! Twice! First one 3 years ago shooting at geylang with joanna and edwin(dun wish to bring it up again) and second time you did not reply me to my PM although you PM me first.

Anyway, do you wanna to engage me on these? If not, please stay away... Thanks!
 

what has this got to do with admins? :dunno: if it's thru the membership of CS that ppl meet and that's why the admins got involved, then I think you can blame the gov't as well for providing such good IT infrastructure for the admins to start CS. Then you can go and blame whoever that thought up of internet, computer, electricity, Bulletin Boards, Forums, etc..

:bsmilie:
 

seems like communication problems to me. why not do it this way, right now, in public, both of you fix a date, place and time which both of you can make it. we can be witnesses that both parties argee to this particular arrangement and hopfully, it can be resolved without further degration in anger.

Aiya.. Small case lah.:D

The problem here is too many assumptions. :bsmilie:
One assumed the writing is directed at oneself.
One assumed no need to call.
One assumed the other will call.
One assumed the other one do not want to answer call.

Assume makes a ASS out of U and ME :bsmilie: :bsmilie:
 

nono..otherwise they will fight and punch and stab each other. like the channel 8 show at 9pm :bsmilie:
 

Thank you audience. I think we have done a good job in our New Year Drama.....kekekeke. Do you think both of us deserve an Oscar?

That's all folks! Show over, what are you waiting for. Finished your pop corn and coke.... hahahahahha

Doc, tomorrow same place for lunch har. Show you some new print I made today.

A very wise move from you, Bobman.
Now the ball is in the Admin court, lets see how they will handle.
Cheers:cheergal:
 

Thank you audience. I think we have done a good job in our New Year Drama.....kekekeke. Do you think both of us deserve an Oscar?

That's all folks! Show over, what are you waiting for. Finished your pop corn and coke.... hahahahahha

Doc, tomorrow same place for lunch har. Show you some new print I made today.

Nothing to watch la... Every participant got bloodied, including the audience who participated. Looks like a Blueman show in Vegas. Everybody got colored! This time without the raincoat!
 

Aiyo, what you expected to see??? Flying tables and chairs har...

Eh... no...

Either one of you ending up in hospital would be great.

But good that the problem is now solved.
 

Let me state a few FACTS

Fact #1

This thread was started because roygoh wrote to me in private and asked that Astin, Bobman, and myself sort out the problems in private.

roygoh had asked that we used phones and SMS. I will come to my issues with Bobman later. The context is this.

Astin had loaned Bobman the use of his studio. Astin tried to contact Bobman many times, asking for the return of the keys and money (presumably owing to him from Bobman). Astin started a thread which was closed by the admin and subsequently deleted. Astin also made the same request in Bobman's thread on his OSM thread. In this thread, I asked Astin to remind Bobman to return my things, if he managed to get Bobman. It certainly did not occur to me to contact Bobman because I had no need to contact him, and also because Astin had already mentioned his difficulties to contact Bobman. This thread was also deleted.

Fact #2

It was Bobman who wrote in CS that he will return my things on 18 December.

Fact #3

Bobman sent me an SMS on 18 December saying that he could not meet me, but he would return the things by the week, meaning by 24 December

Fact #4

Following Fact #3, it is quite clear to anyone that it is Bobman's responsibility to deliver on his promise. It is not my responsibility to remind him or to contact him. He knew what he had to do. Or did he?

Fact #5

Bobman did not deliver on his promise to deliver by the week which ended on 24 December

Fact #6

He claimed to have sent me an SMS on 29 December. From the way he wrote, it appear that I was to keep a watchout for his calls after 24 December? Was I supposed to meet him on 29 December after he arrived in Lucky Plaza? Did Bobman try to leave a message earlier to say he would be in the vicinity on 29 December? In any case, his last SMS to me that I received was on 18 December

Fact #7

Redarding the things which I "left" in his studio. Regarding the assertion by Bobman that I "twisted".

Firstly, the 4x5 fidelity holders. Bobman had got a 4x5 camera. He did not have any holders. I had given him contacts to buy. But he did not and asked me to lend him some. I lent him 6 holders. No I do not need these holders now. I still have more than 20 holders, apart from Fuji Quickloads and Kodak Readyloads. Those holders I lent Bobman were not for my use at his studio, but solely for Bobman. If I had to use my 4x5 camera, the films would first have to be preloaded. And that was done with my other holders. I had also given him some films, free.

Secondly, Bobman's studio was painted black. The studio floor paint was almost invariably "rubbed out", making it unsightly. I lent him the black backdrop to cover that. Yes, I did use that blackdrop. I was brought there because of the inadequqacy of his studio. And I also do not need the backdrop desperately. I have another one.

Thirdly, the lights. Bobman needed some hotlights. He told me someone was selling two Elin hotlights. And asked me to lend him some money to buy the lights. I sent him the money, and he bought the lights from the vendor. I certainly did not bring the lights to his studio. And I did not even asked for a receipt.

Yes, I use the lights on a few occassions.

Was I the only person using those lights? I do not know of other occassions. But certainly on one workshop which I conducted for Bobman using Astin's studio, those lights were used.

And no. I do not need these lights desperately. I have enough lights at my disposal to light up a studio twice Bobman's studio.

Fact #8

Bobman claimed that what I sent him (my address) was inadequate. He needed my full address. He said he needed the full address for his courier to send the things to my office.

Bobman knows exactly where I work. We met several times in the lobby of the office building. He had come to my office before. But he might not have remember the unit number. Bobman knows the name of the building where I have my office.

Bearing that in mind, I sent him this;

"Level 16. Unit 14. #16-14".

But that was obviously not sufficient for Bobman.

So here is my full address: this is the address which I gave to vendors overseas, and they have no problems sending anything to me. So I do not expect a local courier to have any problem finding that address.

3 Mount Elizabeth #16-14
Singapore 228510.

Fact #9

Bobman sent me a pm 9 hours ago. He wrote

"you will wait for me at the taxi stand to help me carry your stuff up"

Wait a minute! What did Bobman write earlier?

He will send a courier. Bobman is the courier?

Bobman wrote earlier that he will send the stuff "right to my front door". And now he said I will have to wait for him at the taxi stand? So he does know where I work! And I had already given him my unit number!

And he wrote earlier that if I were not there to receive the things, the courier would leave a receipt so that I can collect later.

Well, most interesting!

Oh, BTW, my office will be opened from 9.00 am to 5.00 pm. Closed for lunch from 1-2 pm.

Fact #10.

I started this thread because of what I perceive to be a irony in roygoh's "solution". I had sent him a pm and I had not received a reply. The irony was that Astin had resorted to start a thread and write in Bobman's thread precisely because he could not contact Bobman. And yet this was the solution proposed by roygoh.

So I started this thread to seek a solution. No names were mentioned. Just scenario. Hopefully an acceptable solution could be forged. In actual fact, if Bobman had not barged in and making it personal, few people would have known what actually happened, because those threads were removed so quickly.
 

You think you suggestion will work. He even only PM me with just numbers and not the full address. How am I going to send the items to him....... Maybe is this another tactic to hunt people down. Tomorrow he will say, I did send him the address, sorry not address, just numbers.

I have got your pm.

You already know where I work. You might not remember the unit number. So I gave you the unit number.

In any case, See the last post.

I had clearly written the adress.

I will write one more time


3 Mount Elzabeth #16-14
Singapore 228510
 

student, you have presented your case well.

hope the two of you resolve the matter soon and without further implications and complications.
 

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