My 1st short film for The New Paper First Film Fest.

[amboi]

hi guys,

just would like to have honest opinions about my 1st short film. Quality wise which i know is really poor, but i shall not use camera as an excuse. Coz i too believe in the theory of "it's the person, not the camera".... hahaha... all of this is lack of understanding the basic fundamentals, which i realize now. anyway do whack me with your constructive critics for my own benefits...

[video=youtube;nwH4TlMUU6s]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nwH4TlMUU6s[/video]

thanks guys!
,
Riq

 

[Sgdevilzz]

To be honest. Your message wasn't clear enough. I almost didn't get the story until i saw the title when i replayed the video. Focus needs practicing. Most shots are well exposed Color correction needs to be more precise, the bedroom scene especially.

Overall it's a good film for a first timer like you. But bear in mind that you need to keep your focus at the right place. Some shots the face seems to be blurry.

 

[amboi]

noted ! thank you so much.... with take into consideration for the next project....

 

[alzidaney]

its all about the storytelling bro. technicality wise, cut out the dissolves. it takes the viewer out of the story and slows down the pace unnecessarily. you got some nice shot design going, so its not to say you can't do it. you definitely can. the parallel action between the car and the jogger was good.
story wise, i mean you can have the picture of the jogger somewhere in the room, so that the audience gets an idea abit of how related the mother and the jogger are. i mean that's just one device that you can use, there are many others. and you could make the mom's life more dramatic in terms of your shots, like i mentioned, im not too much a favourite of dissolves. that one is entirely up to you. i mean, one easy way is to watch movies and try to figure out why some shots are designed that way. what emotional response they give off. like why a close up and not a wide shot, and vice versa. that kinda thing. hope that helps! keep on making films!

 

[amboi]

now that u mentioned it, it is true la regarding the dissolves thingy. hahaha. thanks for giving good comments! yup i'll try to study more on movies...

 

[scanfilms]

i think when each scene change, you could leave a message. it will help to tell the story better.