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HUNGER & FOOLISH!---------------------------------------------------------------------------If you can't dazzle 'em with brilliance, baffle 'em with bullshit.--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------Four friends, who hadn't seen each other in 30 years, reunited at a partyAfter several drinks, one of the men had to use the restroom.Those who remained talked about their kids.The first guy said, 'My son is my pride and joy. Hestarted working at a successful company at the bottom of thebarrel. He studied Economics and Business Administration andsoon began to climb the corporate ladder and now he'sthe president of the company. He became so rich that he gavehis best friend a top of the line Mercedes for hisbirthday.'The second guy said, 'Darn, that's terrific! My sonis also my pride and joy. He started working for a bigairline, then went to flight school to become a pilot.Eventually he became a partner in the company, where he ownsthe majority of its assets He's so rich that he gave hisbest friend a brand new jet for his birthday.'The third man said: 'Well, that's terrific! My sonstudied in the best universities and became an engineer.Then he started his own construction company and is now amultimillionaire. He also gave away something very nice andexpensive to his best friend for his birthday: A 30,000square foot mansion.'The three friends congratulated each other just as thefourth returned from the restroom and asked: 'What areall the congratulations for?'One of the three said: 'We were talking about the pridewe feel for the successes of our sons. ...What about yourson?'The fourth man replied: 'My son is gay and makes aliving dancing as a stripper at a nightclub.'The three friends said: 'What a shame... what adisappointment.'The fourth man replied: 'No, I'm not ashamed.He's my son and I love him.And he hasn't done too bad either. His birthday was twoweeks ago, and he received a beautiful 30,000 square footmansion, a brand new jet and a top of the line Mercedes fromhis three boyfriends.-------------------------------------------------------------------------------All the children are restless and the teacher decides to have an early dismissal.Teacher: "Whoever answers the questions I ask, first and correctly can leave early today."Little Johnny says to himself "Good, I want to get outta here. I'm smart and will answer the question."Teacher: "Who said ' Four Score and Seven Years Ago'?"Before Johnny can open his mouth, Susie says, "Abraham Lincoln."Teacher: "That's right Susie, you can go home."Johnny is mad that Susie answered the question first.Teacher: "Who said 'I Have a Dream'?"Before Johnny can open his mouth, Mary says, "Martin Luther King."Teacher: "That's right Mary, you can go."Johnny is even madder than before.Teacher: "Who said 'Ask not, what your country can do for you'?"Before Johnny can open his mouth, Nancy says, "John F. Kennedy."Teacher: "That's right Nancy , you may also leave."Johnny is boiling mad that he has not been able to answer any of the questions.When the teacher turns her back Johnny says, "I wish these bitches would keep their mouths shut!"The teacher turns around: "NOW WHO SAID THAT?"Johnny: "TIGER WOODS. CAN I GO NOW?"